You had to have cake and you ate it all
And you ain't getting no extra bowl
The goose is cooked and the chips are down
It's closing time, can't you drink up now?
No complaints, no regrets
This is as good as it gets
This is better, better than sex
This is as good as it gets
This is as good as it gets
Kids can you keep the noise down, please
'Cos daddy's hungover and he needs to sleep
Oh, go and find somewhere else to play
Or help me to find his tourney chair
And no complaints, no regrets
This is as good as it gets
This is better, better than sex
'Cos this is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets
You ain't going through another level
It takes all you've got to keep standing still
And why the hell do you keep asking me
For whom the bell tolls, why it tolls for thee
No complaints, no regrets
This is as good as it gets
This is better, better than sex
This is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets
No complaints, no regrets
This is as good as it gets
This is better, better than sex
This is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets
This is, this is as good as it gets